Middle Aged Nursery Rhymes For the Not Too Faint of Heart.

Jack Sprat could eat no fat, his wife could eat no lean….actually Mr. Sprat would eat no carbs, but seemingly all the fat he wanted and still lost over 10lbs. Mrs. Sprat, however, was told by her doctor to avoid bread, saturated fats and sugar. She lost only 2lbs-one of which she gained back. Mrs. Sprat is not a happy camper.

Where O where has my little mind gone, O where O where can it be…?

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, If Jack jumps over anything, much less a candle stick, he will probably jump over to the chiropractor’s office tomorrow.

Wee Willie Winkie runs through the town-upstairs, downstairs in his nightgown; rapping at the window, crying at the lock, “why are my grandparents asleep in front of the TV? It’s only 8 o’clock?

Little Bo Peep has lost her glasses and can’t tell where to find them-leave her alone and she’ll eventually figure out that they’re on top of her head.

The north wind doth blow, And we shall have snow, And what will poor robin do then, Poor thing? she’ll sit in a barn, And keep herself warm with a nice toasty hot flash.

Hey-they don’t call her “Old Mother Goose” for nothing!




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